July 30, 2026

Cheers to a new day Star,

This is the first long-form issue of The Launchpad.
I don't think each issue will have this level of depth follow this one. I just know for this month, this is what came from my soul.

So here we are; one rich, meaty letter for July. Get your favorite beverage and settle in.

*trigger warning* this one is a deep reflection about loss and grief, if you're not in a headspace for this kind of reflection, come back to this later.

What I've Been Moving Through

Last July, I was laid off.
Last August, my best friend passed away.
Last August, my non-profit had to enter a hiatus because the majority of the leadership board exiting.
And on top of all of that, a myriad of other relationship ended or over these past 6 months. Some of them the closest relationships I've ever had.

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This has been alot of grief in one year.

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And grief, I'm learned, isn't linear. It doesn't come in five neat stages you check off one by one. It comes in waves. It comes in mini-stages that loop back on themselves. You think you're done, and then something reminds you that you're not.

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I've been moving through the stages of grief this past year. And I'm now in a place where I can look back with clarity and realize: my lack of boundaries (which happens more easily when I'm under intense stress) amplified the intensity of this season.

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Possibly even elongated the journey.

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Over the past year I've had relationships with people, entertainment (like social media), organizations and substances that felt off. They went from pleasurable to miles away from anything like comfort. From manipulation to feeling out of control.

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As I started to become aware of the spiral of chaos, I began asking myself, "What was my part?" Because I know that by being accountable for my role, I can choose to behave differently later.

I'm not hostage to these situations. I can choose to leave or change. When I examined the situations I realize, I haven't been holding my boundaries.

Coordinates vs. Conditions

I've been thinking through a concept that came to my mind one afternoon while I was grounding in my backyard. The concept is helping me understand what I do have control over when things start to spiral and I hope it can help you two. Everything we experience is either a coordinate or a condition.
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• My coordinates are where I am – the situation, the people, the time, the place. These are the external facts of my life experience.
• My conditions are the state of my inner world – my mindset, beliefs, actions, and boundaries.

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My conditions are the most important for me to stay aware of because they will be there even when the coordinates change.
I'm glad this idea/framework came to me when it did because I'm on the edge of a few new coordinates:

• a new job (one of these interviews is gonna turn into an offer, I feel it!)
• a new city (yep, it's time to officially leave TX. And yes that has had it's own waves of grief.)

With all of these new possibilites, the last thing I want to do is have my conditions unexamined or unrefined and then repeat the same patterns in a new place.
I can change my ZIP code, but if I don't change my mindset, beliefs, actions, and boundaries, I'll find myself in the same dynamics with different people. Oh hecky naw! No reruns please. I'm tired! 🙅🏾‍♀️

Boundaries Are a Condition of the Soul

Take a moment and think about the many relationships in your life:

• partner
• family
• friends
• work colleagues
• pets
• money
• hobbies
• [add a relationship I didn't name]

How many of your relationships are a reflection of a conditions of your inner self that you don't desire? Maybe some of these relationships are highlighing where you have a lack mindset, limited beliefs, no action, or poor boundaries?

Take a moment and journal about that, or put a timeslot on your calendar to do that journaling later. This is important. It's worth your time.

When we lack awareness of our inner condition we end up outsourcing our well-being to external coordinates.

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We may think: "If I just find the right job, the right partner, the right community, I'll be okay."

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​But the truth is: no external coordinate can compensate for an unexamined inner condition. And your coordinates don't have to change for you to experience peace. That's an inside game.

How I'm getting my reps in to shift my conditions

All of these aspects of our inner condition aren't something we set once and forget. They're a daily practice.

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I've been putting myself through intentional practice through The Artist Way book/course. As of writing this, I'm on week 3 and the level of calm and creativity I feel is such a beautiful departure from the anxiety I was in while spiring out just a month ago. The course is encouraging me to be clear on my boundaries and train my mindset to celebrate the creativity that flows through me from God.

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Reading the book, journaling and doing all of the requests of the book are really helping me show up for myself. I'm feeling more confident, sure of myself and holding my personal promises and boundaries. The peace I've been yearning for has returned.

The 8 Facets of Life: A Boundary Check

In my journal Relax & Remix: A 4-Week Journal to Get Unstuck and Evolve Your Life, I use a framework called the 8 Facets of Life to help people check in with themselves weekly. The facets are:

• Friends – your relationships and community
• Family – your chosen and biological family
• Fulfillment – your purpose, passion, and meaning
• Future – your goals, vision, and direction
• Fitness – your physical health and well-being
• Fun – your joy, play, and rest
• Finances – your money and resources
• Faith – your spirituality, connection to something greater
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Here's the question I've been asking myself – and I invite you to ask yourself: Do you have at least one clear boundary – for yourself or for others – that relates to each facet of your life?
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Not all boundaries need to be with other people. Some of the most important boundaries are the ones you set with yourself.
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• A boundary with Friends: "I will not overextend myself to maintain friendships that drain me."
• A boundary with Family: "I will not attend gatherings where my values are disrespected without a plan to protect my peace."
• A boundary with Fitness: "I will not sacrifice sleep for productivity."
• A boundary with Finances: "I will not spend money to soothe discomfort or overcompensate for what I'm lacking internally."
• A boundary with Future: "I will not abandon my vision for the comfort of staying small."

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Some boundaries cover multiple facets. Like: "I value my time and I will use it with intention." That one touches Future, Fulfillment, Fun, and Finances.
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By keeping track of my life experience in my Relax & Remix journal , I've been able to recognize that if I lack of boundaries in a few areas of my life, I'll have unusually low satisfaction in those areas of my life. The data and awareness is life changing.
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I hope you'll try this reflection and see where you could be enforcing better boundaries.I hope this exercise alone is helping you remember how empowered you are to shift the experience of your life.

The Conditioning We Carry

Now the condition we have within is probably not any where close to our divine "factory settings." Very few of us are able to make it out of childhood without massive conditioning. For most, the main contributor for our current internal condition are the people we were in relationship with in our early years.

We learned patterns. We learned to please. We learned to shrink. We learned to ignore our own knowing.

Maybe you learned that love was transactional. Maybe you learned that your needs didn't matter. Maybe you learned that saying no was dangerous.
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That conditioning created a condition. And that condition traveled with you into adulthood – into your career, your relationships, your relationship with yourself.
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But we are no longer children.
No one is coming to save us.
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​We are creators. We are leaders. We are passionate people of presence, practice, and love.
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And to be all of those things, we must first be that person to ourselves.
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Not to our child. Not to our partner. Not to our organizations or our team.
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To ourselves.

The Practice of Love

When we allow ourselves to be people of purpose in this kind of way – a more engaged way, we move with intention and give our actions meaning – we allow ourselves to experience the practice of loving ourselves.
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What does that look like?

• The practice of love means saying no so you can say yes to what matters.
• The practice of love means holding a boundary with compassion, not cruelty.
• The practice of love means being accountable, not ashamed.

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What we do daily with intention is a ritual. A ritual of love. Love between us, our souls, and All That Is / Source / God.

When we remember that Divine Love is within us, we will be more protective and mindful with our energy and time. The boundaries will begin to be upheld naturally.

If someone invites me somewhere and I don't have an enthusiastic yes, I will decline. I'm not here to do things to "make people happy." I'm here to make myself happy.

This also applies to every time I really want to go hang out, but my mission/work is of greater priority. Just because I like someone doesn't mean I monopolize my time for that experience. Me and my vision need some of that time and energy.

Living on purpose is how we live as people of purpose.

What's Showing Up for Me Right Now

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Honestly? I still have moments of grieving. They are much fewer now. I'm feeling clearer and I'm doing much better at holding my boundaries and loving myself.

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I had to let go of feeling bad about not holding boundaries and start doing the work of holding them. The only way I'll get a the strong inner condition I desire is by going through.
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Through the discomfort of saying no.
Through the fear of disappointing people.
Through the uncertainty of what happens when you stop people-pleasing.
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Here we are just lil buffalo running into storms. Did you know that buffalo run into storms?
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Not away from them. Not around them. Straight through.
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Because that's the quickest way out. The path of least resistance is actually the path of most resistance – facing it directly.
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That's how we strengthen ourselves. Taking on intentional short-term stress is healthy. The avoidance of stress is where we start to develop habits that squander our time and diminish our belief in ourselves.
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If we know we can do hard things, then we should do them. That's the only way we become different people. That's the way we become stronger people.
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Now is the time for us to challenge ourselves to own our growth. Now is the time for us to decide who we want to became and to be willing to go through.
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The only way to becoming the highest version of you is through.And on the other side? I'm pretty sure it's the purest form of freedom.

Your Invitation

This month, consider doing a boundary audit using the 8 Facets of Life.

• Where have your boundaries been loose?
• In which facet is your satisfaction unusually low?
• What's one boundary you can strengthen this week – with yourself, with others, with your time?

Get the Relax & Remix journal if you want support with developing a weekly practice of deep awareness and experimentation through morning check-ins, evening wind-downs, and weekly retrospectives.

If you're facing a specific challenge and desire someone to reflect and build a strategy for your ideal inner condition with you, book a call with me. My Intuitive Strategy Sessions are a great way to get out of your head and your own way. You'll leave with personalized prompts and experiments to support you with getting through with love and grace.

Thank you for taking some time to reflect with me today. I know it's mid-year but it really feels like a new year is starting. I hope there are new beginnings brewing your way as well.

Be well, love yourself, and run into the storm. ✨
​Elayna Ayo
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P.S. I know this issue was much longer than usual. I'd love to get your feedback, simply reply to this email. Thank you in advance for sharing your thoughts.

🌎 Good News from Around the World

Because we need to remember that light is still breaking through – everywhere.
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• 🦋 Monarch Comeback Recognized: New summer tracking data highlighted the continuous benefits of the massive 64% overwintering population increase.
• 🌳 Rights for Trees: A progressive small town just west of Montreal, Quebec, legally recognized trees as living beings possessing their own specific rights.
• 🌱 Mangrove Forests Rebound: A 40-year satellite data study published by Tulane University revealed that global mangrove forests are experiencing a historic turning point and are now growing overall.
• 💧 River Restorations: Conservationists celebrated a major environmental victory as a record number of obsolete dam removals successfully reconnected over 2,300 miles of European waterways.
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• ☀️ Solar Beats Coal: For the first time in United States history, solar energy generated more monthly electricity than coal, supplying a record 12.8% of the power grid.
• 🦠 AI Tackles Superbugs: MIT computer scientists and researchers advanced drug discovery by deploying generative AI models to map out pathways to disrupt drug-resistant bacteria.
• 🎒 Human Library Launches: Copenhagen successfully expanded a unique "human library" concept allowing citizens to "check out" real people to converse and break societal prejudices. (I love this idea so much!)

Build your sustainable systems Stop performing. Start reflecting. Relax & Remix isn't another self-help book telling you who to be. It's a 4-week journal that gets you into the practice of noticing who you already are – and choosing who you want to become.Each week includes: • Morning stand-up (set your intention) • Evening wind-down (track what actually happened) • Weekly retrospective (see your growth in real time) No pressure. No perfection. Just a system to get unstuck and evolve your life – one honest reflection at a time. Track your truth. Create your rhythm. Remix your reality. Purchase your copy

Thank you for reading.​
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